No One Has Time For An Asshole In Uniform
by AdmiralAsscheeks
Summary: Of course when Kankri needs to be with his brother the most, some flirting asshole stands in the way and he happens to snap at the wrong time and to the wrong person. Though quite frankly Kankri never wants to see this guy again, he finds himself needing him more than ever. (Also on AO3) Humanstuck.
1. Chapter 1

**August 9****th**** 2012**

It's the third day in a row that Karkat refused to eat. After he had stated that he wasn't hungry in a sleepy drawl with his head in his hands; you simply sighed and stared blankly ahead at the dingy, yellowing wall behind your younger brother. At this point, you've completely lost your appetite too. Not just of the overcooked pasta on your plate, but your whole humdrum routine that erodes you five days a week.

"Hey shit for brains." You perk up out of your thoughts when Karkat tosses a crumpled napkin at you. "Can I go back to bed now?"

Without a response, you wave your hand dismissively and rub your tired eyes. It almost breaks your heart to see him so morose. The only thing you can do is let him rest and give him food that he refuses to eat.

Misery eats at your overworked flesh, yet you still manage to stand and scrape your food in the trash barrel. You frown down into the thing plastic bag, seeing how much you let go to waste- which also reminds you that you have to take out the trash. With a roll of the shoulders and a good rubbing of the eyes, you're back in business again to finish the job of your prosaic Thursday. Only one more day, you could do it. Friday's payday- the day that you can finally buy Karkat some more pain killers since they are the only thing that keep him running, more than food.

Both of you need to keep your engines going or you'll be in a shithole. Distractions are inevitable for you at work. You often find yourself dozing, which is never a good thing. In fact you've been doing it now, staring down into the full trash barrel. It was only a matter of time before you started drooling.

Putrid stenches rebirth once the bag is lifted, causing you to gag for a good minute. Your fingers scramble to tangle the ends of the bag together to control the smell before you head out the back door, tossing the bag in the large green grin to your right.

Though it's only eight, you're ready for bed. Floorboards groan under your weight, adding some noise to the house besides the silence that is all too loud. The sound of your walking is muffled once your feet transfer to the carpet of your room and remain dead silent when you topple onto your bed.

There's nothing you want more than to escape, preferably into your plush body pillow. It had been a Christmas present from the Maryams just last year, but you found yourself using it much more these past few months. Eventually, you find yourself curled around it, calming yourself by shoving your face into the pillow. You wonder if this would count as fuzz therapy, which you have heard of before on the internet. Whether if it was or not, this pillow was definitely therapeutic.

You blindly pulled your phone out of your pocket, holding down the power button so that absolutely no one could bother you. This was your special time, just like everyone else was entitled to have- your time to rest and enjoy the quiet that other than times like this, was unbearable. You allowed your eyes to close, bidding the horrible Thursday a goodbye.

**August 10****th**** 2012**

In what seems like a blink of an eye, you're back in your office. Sleep did help some, but not enough. There's still some kind of uncertainty that drowns your thoughts. There's nothing to worry about, Karkat's little clown friend was at the house with him. What was his name again? You choose not to dwell on it any further and instead continue to scroll through documents on your computer screen. _Damn, this thing is filthy._

Your fingers begin to wipe off the dirt, though you only end up smearing it even more. This cubicle's getting smaller by the day. The workforce's internet is getting slower, workers more forgetful, and your damn boss even more of a bitch. You sigh and push out of your swivel chair and slide open your desk drawer to get yet another dark chocolate; you're not even in the mood for chocolate, but hey, you need fuel off of something.

They keep you from hopping the border of sanity and you soon have a small mound of purple foil on your desk from them. You're nowhere near proud of how many you ate, in fact you feel a little guilty, knowing you could've spent that money better... Maybe on Karkat for something that he needed.

Guilt ate away at you a while longer until you get an email from your boss.

_I need to have a word with you in the next few minutes. _

After rereading the message, you sigh, scooping up the chocolate wrappers and tossed them into the small barrel under your desk. The work day was almost over, so her small chitchat with you would end it. You smile, seeing this as karma for all of your hard work.

The last chocolate in your drawer is popped into your mouth since having nothing to eat that day, but chocolate and a bagel left quite a bitter taste on your tongue. You decide that your few minutes are up and you head to your boss's office. You stand in the doorway, knocking on her door and she looks up at you expectantly over her magenta glasses.

"Take a seat." She is at her filing cabinet, clearing her desk and makes her gold earrings sway. You do as you're told and wait for a response. Meenah Peixes is what the gold label on the front of her desk reads, and with her high power and sour aura combined, it's safe to say that you find her intimidating.

She was quite a few years older than you, somewhere in her early thirties while you were fresh out of college at the young age of twenty three. It was strange being one of the youngest in your workforce; the dull atmosphere made you feel twice as old and left you longing to just leave.

"Now, you've been here for a good year now, so you may not have been so aware about our company's shape." She didn't sound as confident as she had previously been, which could never be a good sign. It would almost be comforting if you'd stop overthinking. "Look Vantas, we're going downhill with this place and I can't keep everyone together as much as I want to."

"What do you mean?" You blink slowly, trying to comprehend what she's saying. Wow, you're tired. She glared up at you, chewing on her plump lower lip.

"Kankri I'm gonna have to let you go." Before you could get a word in, she began babbling hollow apologies. You didn't want to speak, nor did you think you were going to.

"It's alright." You murmured with a small smile. She shut her mouth, giving you an uneasy look before sighing.

"It was a pleasure having you."

You nod and stand, walking to her doorway. "May I at least use one of the empty paper boxes to take my stuff home?"

She gives you a nod, returning to her work and you chose not to bother her anymore. She looked fairly remorseful.

Thankfully there aren't that many people left in your area of the building so they won't have to watch you with your walk of shame. You quickly packed up your belongings in the empty box you managed to scoop up beside the copying machine. All you have is a couple picture frames, two small silver ones to be exact, of Karkat as a toddler and a more recent photo of him; Aphrodite, your venus flytrap; and the empty bag of chocolates.

You miss the sweetness of those chocolates; you could really use them right now. You leave your office with a once sensational taste now gone bitter in your mouth.


	2. Chapter 2

**August 12****th**

You don't feel as worried as you should two days after being fired. It's a strange experience, staying home all day, knowing that you have no other real priorities. Of course there's Karkat, but today he felt okay and decided to go out with his friends. He hadn't left the house for quite some time, so his sudden burst of energy had put a smile on your face that you haven't worn in what feels like eternity.

The clock by your side reads twelve- something; you can't tell how many minutes of the hour have passed since a glass of water is in the way and distorts your vision of it. Being home alone doesn't feel that much different as when Karkat's home sick. It's equally quiet, though being by yourself guarantees that you won't have to come to the rescue to buy out a pharmacy when your brother's in pain.

Then again there's the feeling of not being enough to handle the job that you once had.

"_It was a pleasure having you"_ your ass. Then again things come up in life and you just have to deal with them.

You finally decide to roll out of bed and get yourself something to eat. Overripe grapes and sunny side up eggs are what you decide to have, which once again reminds you that you have to go food shopping to.

Oh wait, you don't have the money to.

Forget settling for this oblivion- as nice as it is to relax, you need to get back up on your feet again and search for a new job. You sigh and search for the laptop collecting dust under your bed. Maybe a part-time job would satisfy you if you still needed more time to yourself, but it all comes down to whether you have an income or not.

You scroll through pages and pages of Craigslist, reading over the brief descriptions of jobs that you don't think would be enough for you. Even the category of accounting doesn't suit your taste. Nothing does on this damn website and you close out of the tab and shut the laptop.

It's almost disgusting how terrible you're reacting to returning to work. Maybe you just need a longer break before you can think of work, but then again that's selfish when you have a brother to support. For a start, you could check around town to see if any stores are hiring- just something to get you by.

It'll be alright, you just need to calm down. At the office you've always been in overdrive, so a break would have some kind of strange reaction. This could also be a great opportunity to get back in tune with yourself, to see what _you_ actually want for yourself, though you shouldn't get too carried away by it.

The laptop gets slid carefully back under your bed and you head down to the basement to simply relax. Since you've managed to redo the area, it's become the cave for the household. When your own rooms aren't enough, either you or Karkat occupy the cave all for yourselves. Since he was out today, you decided that this would be your time down there; maybe you could search through some storage and let memories numb you up some.

The last two stairs creak the loudest out of the whole staircase, no matter if you stomp down the stairs or tiptoe. It's almost like a security alarm that had evolved as part of the house over the years. The extra couch that didn't match any of the other furniture upstairs was kept down here, along with shelves for your keepsakes.

You had hung up more baby pictures of Karkat for yourself more than him. He still had the same face for over fourteen years, except in these ones the photographer actually got him to smile. You sigh and slump back on the misfit couch, already missing those days. He's already fifteen years old…

Wait that means that you're getting pretty damn old yourself. You frown and sit up straighter on the couch. You're not that old, are you? No, of course not. You're not even in your late twenties; you'll be fine.

You get back onto your feet and search around the storage closet tucked away in the corner. Photo albums get put aside in the back corner of the very top shelf so that at your height it's no more than a dark tower looming in the far back of the closet. Since you're too short to see what else is on the shelf, your hand blindly pats around the area. You grimace when you feel dust begin to stick to your fingertips but eventually you find a binder.

It's black and has your name written in silver Sharpie in the bottom right corner. This thing looks like it's about to fucking fall apart in your hands, so you take it with both hands and skim through the pages.

You thought it'd be just some notes from your history courses in college, but instead you found yourself looking at your old sheet music. The edges of the papers were frayed, but thankfully it didn't interfere with anything important. If you kept this, then your violin definitely couldn't be too far away. The binder gets shut and you leave it on the couch after blowing off the layer of dust that was really starting to annoy you.

It isn't until you have completely ransacked that closet that you found your violin case in the bottom corner, hidden by totes of camping gear that were collecting just as much dust and grime on them. By now you were nearly suffocating yourself with the funk of who knows how long and decide that it's best if you relocate to the couch with your binder. Ugh, you definitely need to clean this thing when you get the chance. The buckles that secure the case shut are sticky with _something_, which only traps the dust on them.

_Disgusting_. You never thought that you'd resort yourself to wipe anything on your shirt, but you figure that you'd wash it anyways. Wow, you've seriously let yourself go.

You huff and open the lid to see your untouched mahogany instrument. The strings are so out of tune that they droop onto the fingerboard. Your fingers pluck uselessly at them in an attempt to revive it before they curl around the neck and lift it out of its maroon, velvety grave.

Your metronome has its own compartment in the case hidden under where the neck rests. You dig it out and wipe its dust on your pants. Once the hairs on the bow are taut again and rosined up finely, you twist the tuning pegs at the top of your instrument, getting each string roughly into the range that it belongs in. With some further usage of the fine tuners everything seems right; though you're a bit rusty since the last time you played in your college days. Just as you settle on the chinrest, your phone rings. You're not quite in the mood to talk but obviously the person on the other line is.

Porrim Maryam is what the caller ID reads. You _really_ don't want to pick up because you know you'll crumble and weep to her about your terrible week.

"Kanny, why aren't you picking up your work phone?" Her vanilla sweet voice pacifies your wracking nerves and you figure that you ought to tell her the truth now.

"I got fired." You mumble and sit down with your violin, laying it beside you. There's a gasp on the other line and it gets quiet for some time. With her persuasive coaxes, you somehow agree to meet up with her for a coffee. It's a surprise that you actually managed to pull on a decent outfit and actually step out of the house.

Maybe your outfit isn't the best after all when you realize how badly you're sweating in a long sleeve shirt. Not the brightest idea, but that café is probably air conditioned. When you reach the small shop, you see Porrim beckoning you over to a corner table. She had already bought you both iced coffees and slid yours toward the empty seat in across from her.

You give a small smile and a nod in thanks, taking your seat. Her jade eyes are soft, though you can't look back for long when there's also an aura of pity and some, mostly on your half, embarrassment. Everything was looking fine for you so far and now you're face is flat on the ground. You clear your throat and stir your coffee with your straw.

"Is there anything you need at the moment? We can go– "

"No, you've done enough to help me for the past few years."

"Kanny, what do you think friends do when they're in need?" Porrim reaches out and places her hand over yours and she knows that you won't dare cross her. You sigh and burrow your other hand's fingers into your hair. This isn't right, none of this is. You worked hard and made the best out of that scholarship and now you're here.

"I seriously can't thank you enough…"

"Hush, now I brought you here for a reason. You spent enough time sulking and I hate to say, but life's going to stomp all over you. It really is." She sits up straighter, tossing a wavy lock of hair behind her back and picking off miniscule pieces of lint that only she can see from her beige halter top. Her finger points at the front window that you had passed on your way here and you turn to see what she's talking about. _Now hiring…_

"I know it's small, but it's a start. You should try applying today."

You turn around to face her and she simply shrugs, knowing how you feel obliged to repay her as soon as possible.

"I will later on today, I promise." You take a sip of your coffee and she nods. You have no idea what to say after that since once again, she saved your ass.


End file.
